10/31/21 “Where the Real Battle Happens” by Nancy E. Petty

Luke 19:1-10; Mark 10:17-22

The charge: Our pastor only preaches about faith, money and stewardship when it’s budget time. The verdict: Guilty. There is no question that if, in a court of law, I was charge with the crime of only preaching about faith and money when it’s budget time, I would be found guilty. As part of the trial proceedings, the prosecution might ask me the question: Why, when it is alarming how much Jesus talks about money, do you hardly ever mention it? Why, when this man you say you follow discussed the topic of money more often than he spoke of faith and prayer combined are you for the most part silent on the topic? I imagine that as evidence, the prosecution would enter into evidence the fact that 11 of Jesus’ 31 parables recorded in Matthew, Mark and Luke were about money or used money as a way to teach spiritual truths. So why the silence?

I would probably begin with the defense that, historically, it has not been a part of the Pullen culture to talk a lot about money. I would talk about how one of our values is each individual following the dictates of their conscience when it comes to faith and matters of faith, including how much one gives to the church. I would cite that Pullen people are typically generous in their giving – with their money and with their time. I would give as an example how during a global pandemic when people were struggling to pay the rent and buy groceries and keep the lights on, Pullen people gave in excess of $20,000 above and beyond their pledges to help those folks struggling without anyone ever asking them to do so. I would present as evidence how many Pullen members grew up in churches where money was talked about to the point of being spiritually abusive, and how still today so many churches preach a prosperity gospel that theologically and spiritually harmful. And how Christian theology around money has been grounded in guilt and scarcity rather than grace and abundance.

Upon cross-examination, I imagine the prosecution might say something like: Reverend Petty, are you aware of the scripture in the gospel of Matthew that says: “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and rust consume and where thieves break in and steal; but store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust consumes and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” And furthermore, Reverend, are you aware of the words Jesus speaks a little later in Matthew’s gospel where he says: “…go, sell your possessions, and give the money to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven, then come, follow me.” And so, Reverend Petty, given these teachings: Do you believe your faith and the teachings of Jesus requires anything specific of you when it comes to what you do with your money? To which I would reply, “Yes, I do.” Then why the silence on this topic?

I don’t know about you, but I am ready for court to be over!

Here’s the truth as I see it. Talking about wealth and money and faith is important. Jesus’ teachings for certain invite, require us to wrestle with our relationship to money because what we do with our money says something about what we value and what is important to us. AND, I don’t think those teachings should be used to raise a church budget. That is why I am so ambivalent, even resistant about preaching on what Jesus said about money on pledge Sunday. What Jesus is inviting us to consider is about something much larger than what we give to the church or any other charitable organization. Jesus is asking us to think about a way of life. He is asking us to consider what we are willing to do, and what we are willing to sacrifice for the common good and to follow him. He is asking us to engage the internal struggle that I imagine every person of faith wrestles with at some point in time that is represented in the stories of Zacchaeus and the young man who comes to Jesus for advice on what he must do to follow Jesus.

Most of you know the Native American fable of the two wolves. It goes like this: A Cherokee elder was teaching his young grandson about life. He said to his grandson “A fight is going on inside of me. It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves. One is evil – he is anger, envy, sorrow regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, self-doubt and ego. The other is good – he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith.” The elder says to the  boy, “The same fight is going on inside you, and inside every other person, too.” The boy thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, “Which wolf will win?” The elder simply replied, “The one you feed.”

Reflecting on this teaching, I guess it is tempting to say that for Zacchaeus, the good wolf won. His response to what it would mean to follow Jesus was to sell his possessions and give half to the poor, and to those he had defrauded he would pay them back four times as much. But to the young man in Mark’s gospel, when faced with what was required to follow Jesus – to sell what he owned and give the money to the poor – his response was shock and we are told that he went away grieving. One might suggest that the bad wolf won the struggle in that moment.

But maybe it is not that simple. The internal struggle around the intersection of faith and money is complicated and complex for most of us. We hear the words of Jesus and we have a deep desire to follow him and his words. And yet, we live in a world where we have responsibilities and commitments, where it takes money to live and provide for ourselves and those who depend on us. For many of us, it’s not about one way winning over the over – selling all our possessions and giving to the poor. Neither is it walking away from the struggle and living only for self-preservation. Where the real battle happens is in discerning how to bring these two wolves together to have compassion for one another. Where the real battle happens is in being honest with where the boundaries lie between ourselves and God. Where the real battle or struggle happens is in how we align priorities with God’s priorities and how our money becomes a representation of that alignment. Each of us who struggle with the relationship of our faith and our wealth have these two wolves living inside of us. Instead of having them fight one another, I wonder if working toward them having compassion for one another is a different way of feeding our hearts and our priorities such that they move toward being more aligned with God’s heart and priorities.

In no way am I minimizing the struggle and the significance of what Jesus is asking of us. Jesus’ teachings on money are demanding and extreme. There is no question about that. He doesn’t let us off the hook on any level. And he is quite clear about the expectation. I am simply suggesting that maybe if we can teach the wolves inside of us to have compassion for one another we can more faithfully and fully find our way toward aligning our priorities with God’s priorities. For I have often found it hard to get to a generous place when I feel like I have to fight. What if the teaching for us today as people of faith when it comes to our relationship with money is to stop fighting and simply start living compassionately – with ourselves and others? Could it be that then our priorities will more fully align with God’s.

Now, let me speak to pledging our 2022 budget, and specifically the idea that budgets reveal priorities. If you have studied the 2022 budget you will have learned that approximately 66% of the proposed budget is for personnel cost. And that building and operating cost represents approximately 23% of the proposed budget. That means that programs and missions and outreach represents 11% of the 2022 budget. These numbers/percentages paint one picture of the proposed budget. Let me paint another picture, I believe, that this budget reveals.

This past week, a dedicated Pullenite called me to ask if I would consider performing the marriage ceremony of a co-worker. He explained to me that his co-worker is a trans-woman who has just been diagnosed with cancer – a very serious cancer. The timeline for the wedding was short with the couple wanting to get married within a week before cancer treatments began. I told him I would be glad to perform the ceremony and to give his co-worker my number. After speaking with couple, we agreed that the wedding would be this coming Tuesday at 6:00 here at Pullen just before her Wednesday appointment with the oncologist. Yesterday around lunch time, I received a phone call from the Pullen person letting me know that his co-worker was at the ER. She had begun coughing up blood early Saturday morning. He and his wife were at the ER with her. The question came: Can you come to the hospital and do the marriage ceremony here, today? I arrived at the hospital a little after 3:00. A little before 4:00 the partner, who had left the hospital to retrieve the marriage license from home, returned to the hospital with the marriage license. Between 3:00 and 4:00 the ER staff had arranged for the wedding to take place in an area of the ER that was somewhat private. They had made bouquets for the brides out of strips of pink plastic that had wrapped medical supplies. They had hung up white sheets for a nice background to soften an otherwise hard cold wall. They had placed a chair in front of the draped wall for the sick bride to sit in. They had googled the traditional wedding march and had their phones set for it to play as the brides took their place. They had gone to the cafeteria and got slices of “wedding cake” for the brides. There was a buzz as ER doctors and nurses asked me if they might attend the wedding. As I began the ceremony I looked up and saw at least 15 nurses, doctors and other ER staff standing in rows behind the two brides. The compassion and love that filled that otherwise sterile room was palpable. Every cellphone in the room was either recording the ceremony or taking pictures. As I pronounce the couple legally married joyous cheers erupted as tears flowed down the faces of all present. In 36 years of ministry, it was one of the most sacred moments I have ever experienced.

What does this story have to do with the budget and the picture it reveals? This budget paints a picture you – that Pullenite who called me yesterday afternoon, and all the Pullenites. This budget paints a picture of your passion and compassion for others. This budget supports a community in which its members are supported by a staff who in turn support other people who may never step foot in this church but who are beneficiaries of the legacy of compassion of the Pullen people. This budget makes real the story I just told you. It supports you, the people of Pullen, to do justice and love kindness in this world by partnering with vocational ministers to walk alongside you and support you as you care for others. 66% is one significant way the church supports you, its members. Whether that is standing with you, or your co-worker, or a friend, or a stranger in their time of need. That 66% also makes it possible for those doctors and nurses, who may or may not be people of faith but who are the salt of the earth, to have a connection to a minister whom they feel they can reach out to if needed, as did one of the doctors did last evening. In one of the many texts I shared with that doctor last night, he wrote: “It was really special to be a part of [the wedding], thank them for sharing that moment with us. I think we will all remember it for the rest of our respective careers.” 66% represents staff and laity doing justice and loving kindness together.

As for that 23% that goes to maintaining this building, let me paint that picture. That 23% makes possible a safe place for those struggling with addiction to gather for their AA meetings. It provides space for parents who are trying to learn how to be better parents. It welcomes and offers up space for artists and activists to make their banners for Moral Monday’s and Poor People’s campaign marches, and to practice their marching songs. It provides safe space for vigils for the larger Raleigh community when there is a tragedy in our world. That 23% welcomes people from various faith traditions a place to come and learn and worship together. That 23% provides meeting rooms for community groups to meet and plan for their work as they seek to make our Raleigh community a better place for all. It provides office space for our neighbor NC State to launch a program for homeless college students. It provides space for Pullen people to gather for worship and fellowship and learning. That 23% represents a beacon of light and hope to people who have been excluded from church buildings. You can choose to see that 23% as propping up an institution that some say is doomed to die in the future. Or you can choose to see that 23% as a picture of hope for people who are longing for a church/a community that accepts and celebrates them for who God created them to be. You can see that 23% as a brick and mortar in a new world of Zoom. Or you can see it as an investment in a building that has been a safe place for and nurtured children and youth who are now adults in the world working for God’s justice-love. All of that for just 23%.

And as for the remaining 11% of the proposed budget – it represents a fraction of the investment this church makes in programming and missions and outreach. I sincerely hope that everything we do as personnel and with this facility are actually missions and outreach. And I must call out that the money you give outside of the annual budget to support special programming and our international partners and community causes is a testament to your unpretentious generosity. So 11% is the official number in the annual budget, but it doesn’t represent the fullness of our missions and outreach.

Your decision to make a pledge to the Pullen 2022 budget will probably not be where the real battle happens when it comes to working out your relationship with your faith and your money. But this I can assure you: your decision to make a pledge to the Pullen 2022 budget will make a difference in the lives of countless others who are looking for a church that will welcome them as they are, and to the faithful around the globe who need the support of generous people like yourselves, and to community partners needing space as they seek to meet the needs of our larger community.

May you follow the dictates of your conscience and heart as you consider supporting Pullen’s 2022 budget.